We’ ve come back to the site of her
conception. She calls it why
and cries all night,
sleepless, wild.
It seems the way is always
floating and the goal —
to live so the ghosts we were
don’ t trail us and echo.
I think we are inside a flower,
under a pollen of stars vast as scattered sand.
The air pulses with perfume,
flowers calling to flowers and the ferrying air.
But my eyes are thin and elsewhere.
I am thinking, maybe
even coming into the soul
is a difficult birth, squeezed by the body’ s vise.
My bent legs like pincers
or the vegetable petals of some tropical flower.
Even my mind gripped by the folds
of the flesh, how the cells keep twinning
themselves out toward complexity.
The tulip trees of the valley
spread their bone canopies into slick green leaves
and fire flowers deep as cups.
Their cups fill with rain, rain
drinks the leaves drinking rain.
I can’ t begin to explain.
How on this porous peak of stone in the sea
our daughter came into me.
Little flick of a fish I could not see.
I was just learning to be human
and upright among all that life.
And what was real was stranger
than night with its dust of unnamed suns.
It was the beyond in us. And she was.