Ireland

A Song: Lying is an occupation

Lying is an occupation,
Used by all who mean to rise;
Politicians owe their station,
But to well concerted lies.

These to lovers give assistance,
To ensnare the fair-one's heart;
And the virgin's best resistance
Yields to this commanding art.

Study this superior science,
Would you rise in Church or State;
Bid to Truth a bold defiance,
'Tis the practice of the great.

Dol and Roger

Nay, Doll, quoth Roger, now you're caught,
I'll never let you go
Till you consent, — To what? says Doll,
Zounds, Doll, why, do'stn't know?
She faintly screamed, and vowed she would
If hurt, cry out aloud;
Ne'er fear, says he, then seized the fair,
She sighed — and sighed — and vowed, —
A'nt I a Man, quoth Roger, ha!
Me you need never doubt,
Now did I hurt you, Doll? quoth he,
Or, pray? says Doll, did I cry out?

Advice to Her Son on Marriage

When you gain her Affection, take care to preserve it;
Lest others persuade her, you do not deserve it.
Still study to heighten the Joys of her Life;
Not treat her the worse, for her being your Wife.
If in Judgment she errs, set her right, without Pride:
’ Tis the Province of insolent Fools, to deride.
A Husband’ s first Praise, is a Friend and Protector:
Then change not these Titles, for Tyrant and Hector.
Let your Person be neat, unaffectedly clean,
Tho’ alone with your wife the whole Day you remain.

Philomena’s Revenge

As a teenager
she was like any other,
boys, the craic,
smoking down the backs.

Later there was talk
she broke things,
furniture and glass,
her mother’ s heart.

‘Mad at the world,’
the old women nod,
round each other’ s faces.

But it was more
than that
and for less
she was punished.

That weekend
she didn’ t leave a cup alone
every chair hit the wall,
Philomena’ s revenge.

Soon after
she was shifted
and given the shocks.

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